At the end of 2018 my relationship of 15 years had broken down beyond repair, and in January 2019 I made the decision to split with my fiance. With a son who was 8 years old at the time, this was the hardest decision I have ever had to make in my life.
I had grown frustrated and resentful of the many compromises I’d had to make to maintain the relationship.
I had found my world had become so small and I felt suffocated with how life had become. When I experienced myself slipping back into a depressive spell in November 2018, I returned to talking therapy and experienced a fundamental shift in my thinking. I had a light-bulb moment which helped me see that these compromises were fundamental to my personal values and they way I wanted to live my life, and for the life experiences I wanted to give my son. I began to imagine what life would be like if I was to separate from my partner and visualized a new life. Realizing this was what I needed to do, I started mapping out the plans and finances I would need to build a new life with my son on my own.
That Christmas, I knew I could no longer continue and discussed this with my partner in December. We agreed to wait until after Christmas before we made the final decision.
In early January we agreed that a separation was the right thing for us both. He moved out several weeks later.
Following the split, I felt an incredible sense of relief and freedom, and experienced both highs and lows. From the excitement of jetting off on holiday abroad with my son for the first time, to buying the house back into my name.
Yet by mid-September of the same year, I hit rock bottom! The Adrenaline had kept me distracted from the changes, but I hadn't dealt with the emotional fallout properly and but was now in tears daily at a point when I thought I should be moving on. I had been struggling to concentrate at work, and one morning I had a panic attack on the way to the office. I realized I just couldn’t face being around people.
At this point I knew I had to do something positive to shift me out of this dark place. I was mourning the loss of the future family life I believed we would have forever and had to accept things were changed forever.
I desperately searched for things to help me and made the decision to revisit my NLP qualification, and sought help from a divorce coach. It was a big investment for me but I knew I needed some practical support to get me through this time. Working with a coach left me feeling feeling empowered and ready to face the future.
My line in the sand was firmly drawn and the experience gave me so much clarity.
I'd gone from feeling lost in a stale relationship, to feeling confident, authentic, and more grounded in who I am.
I’m focused on what I what from my new life now and have plan to help me achieve these things.
The whole experience really inspired me, and having worked in Learning and Development for over 20 years, I decided to train to become a Divorce Coach, to help others through their breakups and heartache.
It's a great opportunity to combine my wealth of experience in personal development and coaching, with a specific focus to help others make a positive difference in their hour of need, and help them see that a break up doesn’t need to be the end of the road, far from it. It's just the beginning!
Accredited Separation & Divorce Coach (Sara Davison)
Mental Health First Aider Certificate
Member of The International Coaching Federation
NLP Practitioner (ITS NLP)
SDI Facilitator Relationship Awareness Tool (Core Strengths)
MBTI Step 1 Facilitator (Myers Briggs)
Having worked in the field of Development within large corporations for over 20 Years, I have a wealth of experience in coaching and understanding of relationship dynamics. I have the tools and understanding to help you to create the life you imagine and get a renewed sense of self.